Asking Eric: Partner is always rude to neighbors

Dear Eric My partner and I years are fortunate to have multiple residences We have invariably lived together apart It s unconventional but it works for us My primary residence is in a large urban condominium building and his is rural in a small town We re inevitably together on weekends we alternate the destination but apart during the week I am very friendly though not particularly close with multiple of my neighbors It is customary to greet each other in the elevator My partner doesn t greet or even acknowledge others including the door staff He will only be friendly with a very sparse that we are close with We have a great relationship otherwise and very rarely argue The last time we did it was over this issue because I was extremely embarrassed when one of the neighbors approached us and he downright dismissed him We ve spoken about this but he maintains that he can pick and choose his own acquaintances I ve tolerated this for multiple years learning to pick my battles but this not long ago resurfaced and I m at a loss Your thoughts and advice would be greatly appreciated Un-Neighborly Dear Un-Neighborly I empathize with you Your building has a certain practices and when your partner dismisses that heritage it reflects poorly on you and could affect your relationships with your neighbors It s especially rude to not acknowledge door staff Being impolite to facility workers is unacceptable I m presuming that in the arguments you ve had about this you ve explained to your partner how his behavior affects you I m sorry that he doesn t see the value of a simple nod or hello But it may be time to accept that this is just how he is Selected in the building may take offense but I m sure there are plenty of others who don t care either way or have grown used to the grumpy man who doesn t speak Also he may not be the only one who s brusque If you re treating your neighbors the way you think they should be treated and extending basic kindness that s perhaps the best that you can do Dear Eric How long do you keep greeting cards like birthday congratulations holidays thank you and so on I understand keeping those with sentimental value but I tend to keep all of them My sister suggested tossing them now since we re all bound to pass away someday and it would be more work for her to deal with them later What s holding me back is the emotional attachment I have to them even though chosen are just simple cards with less than two sentences I m unsure what to do I feel guilty for tossing them but I also need to declutter Could you please help What is the general rule for keeping received cards Greeting Cards Dear Greeting There s no wrong way to do this Particular people read the cards appreciate the messages and throw them away Others display the cards they receive for a week or two and then toss them Others hold on to them forever Personally when it comes to holiday cards I like to put them on the fridge and leave them up all year until they re replaced by next year s cards This is also a great way for me to discover I ve fallen off of someone s greeting card list For a multitude of it comes down to space constraints So if you find you re holding on to cards that don t have sentimental value and you want to declutter perhaps set aside an afternoon to look at them again receive the warm wishes again and then throw them away knowing they ve done the job they set out to do There s no need to throw away cards that mean something to you however And if they re really creating a space issue you can inevitably take photos of them and throw away the originals so you ve got a digital copy forever Dear Eric Ticking Biological Clock was and craved a baby You suggested several things and quite a insufficient alternatives but one you missed is something that is ostensibly present in multiple communities the Foster Grandparent Venture Apparently not only are there a multitude of children out there who either have no grandparents or whose grandparents are very far away even in a different country Furthermore apparently sometimes their parents long for this type of relationship and connection as well Related Articles Asking Eric Aunt wants information about adopted niece s birth mother Asking Eric After parents divorce adult child picks sides Asking Eric Friends insist on inviting themselves over for pool parties Asking Eric After husband gets sober wife gets stuck in a funk Asking Eric Casket photo creates rift in family Tell him to look into the concept wherever he lives and he might be absolutely thrilled Also Considering It Dear Considering I believe you re writing about the AmeriCorps Seniors Foster Grandparent Activity a wonderful initiative for participants and older to spend to hours a week providing tutoring mentorship and endorsement to children in schools and population centers Those interested can find more information at americorps gov Send questions to R Eric Thomas at eric askingeric com or P O Box Philadelphia PA Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas com